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by Sonja Mills, directed by Ruth Madoc-Jones

Union Eight Theatre, Buddies in Bad Times Theatre, Toronto

January 12-30, 2011

To start with the obvious joke--The Bird is a real turkey.  It achieves the uncoveted trifecta of poor writing, direction and acting.  It’s impossible to believe that Sonja Mills, who wrote the intelligent and moving piece The Danish Play in 2002, could have produced this shambles.

The party that devolves into chaos is an old dramatic metaphor for decline of civilization, but Mills completely mismanages it.  Mia (Lesley Dowey), a taxidermist, and Kate (Astrid Van Wieren), a marketing executive have lived together for three years.  For reasons never once explained, Mia’s younger pregnant sister (Caitlin Morris-Cornfield) lives with them too.  We are supposed to believe that the jealous Mia has somehow convinced the the otherwise intractable Kate to invite Kate’s new assistant Petty (Anna Chatterton) over for drinks in order to see if the two are having an affair.  Not only is the premise wobbly but the rider that Petty can bring along her relatives is completely illogical.  Petty brings along her moronic common-law husband Gord (Jimi Shlag), her brother Boo (Bruce Hunter) and, even more incredibly, his estranged wife Donna (Veronika Hurnik).  For about an hour of the 90 minutes, Mills’ unimaginative dialogue revolves around the benefits and hazards of smoking, drinking and taking drugs.  Then, what was a comic altercation between Kate and Boo, a banker, becomes a preachy, sophomoric debate about whether capitalism or advertising is more to blame making the world the terrible place it now is.  Suddenly, out of nowhere, Mills decides she’s not writing a comedy but a tragedy like Festen and plays the incest card.

It’s hard enough for a cast to deal with motivationless actions and one-dimensional characters.  It’s even worse when they seem under-rehearsed and, except for the unflappable Van Wieren, uncomfortable on stage.  The effect is no better than a mediocre student production.  Mills’s central metaphor is a stuffed bird--one that, confused by the lights of high-rises, has crashed into them and dies.  This could just as well apply to a play that filled with vigorous but conventional anger and is confused by the dramatic structure it is trying to achieve.  Both the stuffed symbol and the play are artificial and lifeless.

©Christopher Hoile

Note: A version of this review appeared in Eye Weekly 2011-01-13.

Photo: Astrid Van Wieren and Lesley Dowey. ©Keith Barker.