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by Eleanor Bergstein, directed by James Powell

Mirvish Productions, Royal Alexandra Theatre, Toronto

November 15, 2007-April 5, 2009

Dirty Dancing: The Classic Story on Stage--that is the full title of the show currently having its North American premiere at the Royal Alex.  The key word missing from this title is “musical.”  As it turns out this is merely truth in advertising.  After all, not one of the principal characters sings?  Of the 51 songs, culled from a wide variety of popular music, only 18 are sung by actors on stage.  Otherwise, the songs serve as a kind of soundtrack for a spoken play with dance interludes.  As for the two most famous songs, “Hungry Eyes” is entirely pre-recorded while “(I’ve Had) the Time of My Life” is sung live by two characters we hardly know. 

Ardent fans of the 1987 movie that forms the basis of the show may consider it a “classic story”.  Others may view it a so much drivel.  For the uninitiated, in 1963 the Houseman family goes on its annual vacation to Kellerman’s resort in the Catskills.  There Frances “Baby” Houseman (Monica West) falls in love with the resort’s resident dance instructor Johnny Castle (Jake Simons), though this breaks the guest-staff barrier and general ‘60s mores of virginity until marriage.  When Penny (Britta Lazenga), Johnny’s regular dance partner, is indisposed, Baby volunteers to be taught their routine for the resort’s final show.  In this coming-of-age tale, the only sources of tension are “Will they be found out?” and “Will she learn the routine?”  To fill out the nearly three-hour running time, author Eleanor Bergstein includes countless scenes of everyday resort life and numerous mirco-subplots concerning petty squabbles between guests and staff.  The trouble is that she can’t see what is important and what isn’t.  If only an outside editor weeded out all these pointless bits, the show would be less tiresome.  If only, too, the dancing were remarkable, the show might take off, but it isn’t.  On display are only standard ballroom and the so-called “dirty” dancing which appears to be a kind of vertical dry humping with lifts.  You can see far more exciting examples of both in ordinary televised dance contests.

Though the script is taken almost word for word from the film, on stage the dialogue sounds like tripe from some cornball soap opera.  It doesn’t help that the cast also delivers the lines in portentous soap opera style.  Some actors do make their lines sound natural, most notably West, who gives truly glowing performance that almost makes the show worthwhile.  She demonstrates real expertise in delineating Baby’s growth from awkwardness in speech, dance and emotion to full assurance.  Dylan Trowbridge as the resort manager’s son and Jeffrey Wetsch as an amoral waiter are also standouts.  Sadly, Simons has the pecs and the moves to be the leading man but not an ounce of character much less the necessary charisma. 

Re-enacting the movie, not appealing to the imagination, is what this show is all about.  In fact, there is so much use of background video it amounts to a kind of professional movieoke.  If that’s why you go to the theatre, this show is for you.  If not, why not see a real musical?              

©Christopher Hoile

Note: A version of this review appeared in Eye Weekly 2007-11-16.

Photo: Jake Simons and Monica West.